The Good, the Bad, and the Skort

(original entry written on 6/16/2013, 3:13 am)

So, my second day of Introductions brought a few revelations and a delicious dozen of fat oysters. My first revelation was that no matter how much you want to believe people are inherently good, and perhaps most of us are, we're all capable of crappy moments. My mover guy told me before he moved my stuff from Denver, that storing these two pieces would not cost me anything extra. Today I paid him $100 for half the storage and for driving to the beach to deliver. Then the cherry was that his kid, and when i say kid I mean 10-year old boy, broke the leg of my desk, which Mover Guy tried to blame on the desk as having faulty screws. I should mention he initially wanted $125 from me. The $25 was his reimbursement of letting a child help him when I offered a gazillion times. So yeah, great start to day two. 

Another revelation was about towels. There are reasons people say to always wash towels before the use of a brand new one. "Well, DUH" you're saying. I know. I had originally thought it was because it's new and a thousand people might have touched it, or that it's not soft yet, or something that's either germy or causes discomfort. It never occurred to me there would be a million tiny little orange and yellow fuzzies in my hair and about to be incorporated into my Coppertone. *sigh and a shrug*…. Meh. So I look like Animal from The Muppets for a day or two. He was totally the coolest.

ma-na-ma-na do do de-do-do...

The third revelation has to do with my on-going struggles with being in my 40's and how they are affecting me physically. Like how you wake up one morning and look in the mirror and are like holy shit, gravity sucks. I recently bought something to swim in, forced by the hand of my best friend's community pool and by her, as she's going from rack to rack, grabbing tops and bottoms of all styles. I settled for a cyan-blue and white tie-dye-ish, racer-backed tankini top and a board skirt in black. What's a board skirt? It's like board shorts only a mini skirt.

Ok, a board SKORT. Whatever. It appeases the tom-boy in me, covers shit, and isn't a bikini.

So, today I put on the swim ensem', and decided to walk the beach in front of a bazillion people to test these new little issues. This is where the third revelation comes in. Now taking a step back into history for a sec, 20 years ago my other best friend and I lived at the beach in Florida where a jaunt down the beach in our bathing suits usually resulted in either plans that night at The Edge, or at the least, the token cat-calling. You know, from the morons who truly believe crass phrases and pick-up lines would actually make a girl say, "ohhh yes, I would LOVE to do that with you/to you/please" (eye-rolling)… Fast-forward back to today, I realized I am now officially in The Invisible Stage. It's true. It DOES exist. And I have mixed emotions about it. It's not that the 20-30-somethings on the beach would be appalled by what they would see if they looked. It's that they don't have any interest in looking. On the one hand I feel almost offended. Then I fear I might just look like some haggard cougar prowling the beach… Then I'm relieved to realize I don't have to suck everything in anymore as I pass by a hottie little lifeguard because they AREN'T LOOKING. See? Mixed. But I prefer that last reaction. It's very liberating to not HAVE to be concerned with how I look in a bathing skort. But the 30-year old girl [ego] who still lives in my head is still hurt by not being "checked out" by beach lovelies.

*wink*.